And now for something entirely different.

I have gotten sick of blogging about being sick and being saddled with Babymama and Holy Terror. Accordingly, today I shall blog about something different - that being my professional life.

I am a lawyer. I really enjoy my profession, most of the time. The cerebral challenge, the logic puzzles, the dry, informational, hopefully persuasive writing - these all satisfy my Libra soul. Not to mention, I win fairly often, and this is also satisfying.

Law school was an educational experience on many levels. I went to the law school that was ranked #26 the year I applied - not first-tier, but extremely respectable. My undergrad alma mater was a very small, inexpensive state college. I had done very well there, I felt, largely because the average student there was so very poor that it made my middling efforts look exceptional in comparison. So I get to this law school and am thrown in with folks whose undergrads are Harvard, Yale, pretty much all the Ivy Leagues and exclusives. I made a concerted effort not to allow myself to be intimidated. I studied and prepared for class. I spoke up in class. And you know what? I was as good at the game as anybody there. And by having the guts to open up my mouth and speak, I got a reputation as one of the smart ones, one of those who "got it." In other words, other students there were sometimes intimidated by me. This was very startling, and educational - it's not the name on your degree, but what you actually got out of your curriculum that matters. Anyway, law school was hard work, but in between, it was a lot of fun, and I made some good friends there. I actually miss that period of my life, sometimes.

The first couple of years out were pretty educational too. First I worked for a tightwad solo practitioner (I always knew I didn't have it in me to give the 70+ hours a week demanded of associates by the big firms.) We eventually had a meltdown due to personality conflicts. Then I went to a "boutique" litigation firm - a small firm specializing in high-profile litigation work which nonetheless billed itself as a "lifestyle" firm. Yeah, what a load of bull. I toughed it out for almost two years. I got married while I was there and my hubby and I honeymooned for 2 1/2 weeks in Europe. I expected to be refreshed when I returned to work. When, instead, I was twice as miserable as I had been before by virtue of having tasted freedom, I knew I had to leave.

I then spent a year and a half as a self-employed contract lawyer, meaning I hired out my services as an associate to solo and ultra-small-firm lawyers needing an extra hand in a pinch. This was the free-est, most enjoyable period of my legal career to date. I met and worked for some really interesting lawyers. Also, I got a ton of really valuable practical and substantive experience. I would still be doing this today if it weren't for one overwhelming cost factor - insurance. Health insurance, and malpractice insurance. These two things were crushing costs. I was barely affording a bare-bones health insurance policy, and malpractice insurance was out of the question. This was just too big a risk to run in the long term.

Duriing this period, I got a callback on a clerkship application I had filed a long time ago. The person selected had bailed out on the clerkship with 4 months to go - would I like to finish out her term? Of course I would. Federal clerkships are like gold on a lawyer's resume. I did 4 months of the clerkship at the same time that I was doing the self-employment thing.

One of my primary tasks during this clerkship was to review, evaluate, and draft decisions on cases in the large backlog of cases coming to the court out of one particular administrative agency. It was pretty boring stuff, but the law of it was easily picked up. Towards the end of my clerkship, I saw a vacancy announcement for a lawyer for that very same agency. I figured, what the heck, and put in my application. I wasn't sure I wanted the job given that the subject matter wasn't overly exciting, and I wasn't upset when I didn't hear anything back.

My clerkship ended. Back to the self-employment thing full-time. Enjoying it, but more and more concerned about being unable to afford malpractice insurance. Getting by, but barely, financially. Then, literally eight months after I submitted my application, I got a callback from the agency. Would I like to come in for an interview? Sure, why not. Shortly thereafter, a second interview. And then I got an offer. I turned it over in my head for a few days and then accepted. With a steady government job, I wouldn't have to pay my own health insurance, and wouldn't need malpractice insurance at all. I had my doubts over whether I would find professional satisfaction there, but that wasn't my primary concern at the time.

I came to be glad I made the decision to work here. First of all, the people I work with are pretty d@mned cool. My boss is just the best, nicest, most understanding guy you could ever want to work for. The people here are a wealth of information wrapped up in various degrees of coolness and/or niceness. I got tons of support during my pregnancy and recovery from my c-section. And there is no pressure to bill hours. As long as you're putting in the required 40 hours, you're golden. Granted, I'd love to make more money, and I'd love to be accruing vacation and sick time faster than I can here, and I'd love to have dental insurance as well as health insurance, but all in all I think I'm happier and have a much more balanced life that most of the people I went to law school with.

I can't say I'll be here forever. It's a very long commute from home, and it's getting inconvenient all the time. (The bus company I've used the whole time just cut out the bus I've taken home every day since I had my babygirl. Now my only choices are a bus that leaves the same time I get off work - 20 min's away - or one that leaves at the start of rush hour and would get me home 2 hours later than I now get home. Or carpool home with the same guy I carpool in with in the morning, passing up my current transit subsidy and leaving me dependant on another individual's attendance blips. Or just drive my butt in and pay $12/day for parking and risk road rage and/or falling asleep at the wheel at 5AM.) And now that I have a kid to put through college I have a nagging feeling I'm going to need to bank more cash at some point than is currently an option. Plus I'd like to retire someday, and have to admit to my great shame that at age 35, my & my husband's current retirement savings are exactly $0.00. So I think eventually I'm going to have to go back to law firm life. But in the meantime, with a small child at home, I know I've got a good thing going on here, and I am very, very grateful.